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Blackwood. Sheriff-Egg Saga ends with small victory for Boris

Boris the egg. | 15.06.2004 19:15 | Ecology | Oxford

In punishment for throwing two eggs at the under sheriff of Blackwood during the evictions Boris was today fined £43 costs and told to bahave himself for a year. Meanwhile the Sheriff and his henchmen backed down from committing purgery.

STOP PRESS - THERE ARE NO BAILIFFS AT BLACKWOOD AND WORK CONTINUES ANYONE UP FOR AN ACTION?

A dirty tricks campaign by the prosecution ended today as the crown withdrew false stone throwing allegations against Boris. The under-sheriff and two policemen had all stated these false allegations in thier statements (effectively conspiring to pervert the course of justice), and costing Boris extra train fares and inconvinience in the process.

At his third court appearance Boris confessed to egg throwing and magistrates sentenced him to a 12 month conditional discharge and placed him on the egg-offenders register. Boris was somewhat taken aback as the magistrates said "we never want to see you again", as he had hoped for the pleasure of thier company at post-trial afternoon tea.
(However his spirits were soon lifted as the Sheriff and his evil cohorts were led away in chains to complete a 12 month tree planting order for submitting false witness statements - ok this last part is just dream).

Boris who has now vowed to end his egg throwing career in favour of non voilent (vegan?!) actions, was also fined £43 costs. In the late afternoon haze at witness reported seeing a person who looked remarkably like Boris, happily removing exactly 43 of Costains road marker posts beneath the shadows of St Davids wood.

Boris the egg.

Comments

Hide the following 3 comments

Boris, dahlingg.

15.06.2004 20:41

Alvays you are beink my special leetle hero.

Natasha


nice one boris!

15.06.2004 22:42

tip top result :)

bolstered boris


beautiful

15.06.2004 23:32

"In the late afternoon haze at witness reported seeing a person who looked remarkably like Boris, happily removing exactly 43 of Costains road marker posts beneath the shadows of St Davids wood."

Nice one :)

.


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